15 September 2006

THE GREEN MAMBALINA (OR IS IT A ….) HAS STRUCK!! (Here’s the unedited Scoop) After all the backbiting that has come to light on DOING LIFE, by you all know who, Tha Teacha felt that an end had to be put to all this to ensure that lives are not spent. Therefore, the following rules were enforced this Thursday evening. Please note these are ONLY applicable to the TP (Teacher’s Pet) GANG and those of you who are aspiring to be a TP:
TP GANG RULES Treat Tha Teacha With Respect! Treat Your Fella Gangsters As You Would Like To Be Treated? Ensure That The PS Choccie Saying ‘We Love You’ Is The Only Choccie Left In The Candy Jar Upon Leaving The Blue Room! Never Be Without Your PMS Bag! Be Armed With Your Eyelet Getter! The Head Of The Table (Not The Teacher’s Pet) Is Elected Every Three Months! No Back chatting Tha Teacha! Put Up Your Hand When You Want To Address The Teacha – No Shouting! Do Not Encroach Your Fellow TP-Gang Member’s Work Space. Always Be Colour Coded/Co-Ordinated i.e. Hair Colour, Dress And Accessories Matching Your PMS Bag’s Colours! At Least Get 5 Minutes Scrapping Done With A Shut Trap!!!! NEVER BE AFRAID!!!! PS: The Blue Room Patrol is watching!! So things put straight now. Here’s the horror story of the TP Gang’s latest onslaught. It has been established via serious investigation that an attack has been made on Unit 4, Sandlea, Kloof at 6pm on Thursday, 14 September 2006, by the TP Gang some of whom had an odd alcoholic air about them? It is suspected that Stokers could have been frequented beforehand to plot their attack. It has also been established via the Hunky PI of the Blue Room Patrol that there is a Greek Connection within this Gang and that a French Connection could also be lurking on its outskirts.

The TP Gang was armed with their PMS (Potent, Mysterious and Suggestive) Bags (AMM Tote-Ally Cool Bags). One of these bags were kitted out with the latest fashionable overnight tools (i.e. razor, toothpaste tube, shower cap, night dress, scrubber, cream - everything but the toilet brush). This bag was spotted on a Greek Connection’s arm just as the main gate of Sandlea was scaled. The PI (being of Irish descent) could have sworn that he had also seen a Lepracorn scaling Sandlea’s main gate with the Greek Connections. The Lepracorn’s identity was well disguised with a green baseball cap drawn low over its eyes. The PI could not believe his eyes when he saw, what seemed like the leader of the TP Gang, fiddling with the electronics of Sandlea’s main gate. The PI being warned to watch out for an attack by an Eyelet Getter, was very hesitant to approach the leader of the gang. Due to hesitation on his part the leader was one step ahead of the PI. In a blink of an eye, the main gate opened by itself and the gang leader drove into Sandlea with the gate closing behind him/her suddenly, leaving dust in the PI’s face, who just-just could make out the license plate of the stolen vehicle: TEACHER’S PET - THE ONE AND ONLY’.

There was a hush when the TP-Gang entered the Blue Room, as shock struck them when they saw that there were suddenly Rules for them stuck on the wall (see above). This was way too much to comprehend.

The TEACHER’S PET was then hit by another shock when she turned around to see, there right in front of her very own eyes, one of her gangsters has evolved into a Lepracorn! – armed with her own KIWI-green PMS bag, and a funny looking green energy disc on a stick. “So much for evolution” she thought –

“is this also going to be my downfall as leader of the gang?” she pondered to herself. “No ways I have to strike back immediately, if I want to keep my leadership.” Without warning the gang leader drew out her last trump card (with the rest of the gang as her witnesses), her latest acquisition the All My Memories Pink Photo Box).

Everyone was holding their breath as one could cut through the atmosphere with a knife. At last the Lepracorn was defeated by this final blow of the gang’s leader and submitted to be a follower in the gang by also ordering her Green AMM (Leather Look) Photo Box. Everyone sighed in relief. The other half of the Greek Connection was then formally initiated into the gang by receiving her Blue PMS Bag. True to gangsters’ tradition she was colour co‑ordinated down to a T so that she could immediately 'become one' with her PMS bag.

Events took an unexpected turn when the gangsters’ meeting was rudely crashed by an outsider claiming to be the future Gang Leader in training. Shocked TP‑Gangsters had to look on as the new invader handed Tha Teacha a ginormous PS Choc with ‘You Are Great’ inscribed on it. “Fortunately things happens in threes” the Leader thought to herself, “I should be safe for the remainder of the evening”. Never could she have known that the worst was yet to come!

The Leader experienced her most dreadful teatime ever. Her followers first of all deprived her of her staple diet being Unit 4’s home executive’s Milk Tart, leaving her to drool as they were chomping away on their tart. After which her followers decided that their Leader needed a serious image spruce up seeing that their Leader did not live up to the following rule: “Always Be Colour Coded/Co-Ordinated i.e. Hair Colour, Dress And Accessories Matching Your PMS Bag’s Colours!”

She was kitted out with a pink nightie (attire donated by the Greek Connection), with the very apt “COW” design on the front. White and Pink Spotted headgear was also required.

Once the attire was sorted out she was stream lined by a thorough shaving and messaging. All done her followers stood back and all agreed that their handy work was most impressive.

May this blog entry be a fair warning to all and sundry who are aspiring to be a TP!! The characters were: The Greek Connection: (Stella Fischer and Nicola Jennings) Gang Leader (Libby Houareau) Lepracorn (Beverley Dow) Gang’s Councilor (Carol Liebrandt - proud future inhabitant of Shady Pines or is it Piny Shades)
The Outsider (Michelle Ramsay) Tha Teacha loves you all to bits! Thanks for being such great sports and always try to live by the following: Time is Like a River.... You can't touch the same water twice because the flow that has passed will never pass again. So live each moment as if it is your last!! - Back to normal again


  1. Anonymous12:52 PM

    As I have the pleasure of being the first to comment on this new agenda.... I wish to just confirm that the Teacha is just the BEST!!!
    What an imagination WOW. See you all now if I am late you know it ws because I had to visit the blog for new developments to keep up with the times.

  2. Anonymous3:49 PM

    I second that. Teacha, you have a amazing creative streak which is why you are in such demand. I always look forward to seeing what has been put on your blog.

    TP Gang - be warned, I might pay you another visit - when? you are thinking - when you least expect it!

    Happy scraping

    Michelle (The Outsider)


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